looking for signs after parting
As a child, I always looked for signs. I counted steps on my way to places (something I have since learned is common among many musicians) and was sure if I ended on an even number, I had good luck. If I was wishing fervently for something, I would look for confirmation everywhere that my wish would come true: A word on the side of a passing delivery truck, a song on the radio, an overheard word from a stranger’s conversation; all of these were fair game for affirming my wish would come true.
This poem by Sara Teasdale reminds me of that experience of looking for signs at every turn. In this instance, the fever you feel when you are separated from the one who has consumed you - awakened you - compels you to seek them in all you see and hear.
After Parting (Sara Teasdale)
Oh, I have sown my love so wide
That he will find it everywhere;
It will awake him in the night,
It will enfold him in the air.
I set my shadow in his sight
And I have winged it with desire,
That it may be a cloud by day,
And in the night a shaft of fire.
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